*When food arrive*
"you’re old enough to pay for your own things"
It was particularly nice today :)
Fuck this, I’m going to bed.
And the same as when people find out I’ve never had a boyfriend. They’d say “Whyyyyy? But you’re so pretty” and all that shit. Like, that makes me feel like my personality is the issue. But I know it’s everything. Nobody wants me as their partner, or even as a friend, really. I feel like I’m constantly being forced to become a better person to impress everyone else so I can be accepted. Wonder why I’ve been wearing so much make-up lately? Take a guess. I don’t think it’ll surprise you, though.
I just really, really hate having such a low view about myself, physically. I hate my body shape and I particularly hate every feature on my face (except for the colour of my eyes). It really sucks when I meet people and they’d compliment me on my appearance. Like, fuck, I don’t see it. And then I start to feel like they’re lying to me, just to get together or something. If I’m really emotionally unstable, I’ll start crying if it happens. I’ve been on the verge of crying during these situations countless times.
It makes me feel like shit. It just sucks..
THROWING UP BECAUSE THIS IS REAL
Type O Negative - Bloody Kisses (1993). Both covers.